When I first went into school they tried to put me into special ed classes, but my mom insisted I be in the regular classroom. I don’t remember a whole lot of grade school, but, as I got older I remember I felt kind of alienated, especially in middle school, because kids at that age are, well, you know, it’s not easy.
I feel like things were pretty good by the time I got into high school.
Growing up, I didn’t have any sense that my disability wouldn’t let me do something. I remember all the way up until I was 12 years old, I was always saying that I would be a Marine or that I’m going to be Special Forces. I was a typical boy. I remember people asking “Well, how’s that going to work?” I just thought “Oh, I’ll figure it out.”
Eventually, of course, I figured out maybe being a Marine isn’t it. But, I remember being a kid and just holding on to that kind of attitude for as long as possible. It put me in the right state of mind to just go and figure it out. You know, you can make changes, innovate two different things. Is it going to work out? Maybe. Maybe not. But, if you want to do something, do it your own way.
“Growing up, I didn’t have any sense that my disability wouldn’t let me do something.”
When I was seven, I told my mom I really wanted to try karate. My mom has always been very supportive; she never shot down anything I wanted to try, even if she wasn’t sure it would work out. She definitely has stories from her perspective, but she was really keen on never letting me be lazy.
When we walked into the karate place, the Sensei looked me up and down , and he asked “Can you move your legs?” I said, “Yeah, I can.” Then he demonstrated a few more simple things and asked “Can you do this?” I could do it.
He said, “Yeah, we can definitely work with you.”
Karate by its nature is very adaptive. In martial arts, the name of the game is innovation.
I always had a pair of aluminum crutches, so we found a second pair and we wrapped it in those foam pipe insulation tubes and taped it up so it would be safe to practice and do everything all the other kids were doing. I could even spar.
I was really lucky. At the time, it was a small, private place, not a lot of students. [My disability] was never an issue with the other kids. With [the adaptations], I was able to keep up to some degree or another.
I remember my mom telling me much later that she was really worried that I would walk in and they would take one look at me and say “you can’t” and have that rejection shatter me.
But, the first place we walked into ended up being the place I stayed at and martial arts became a lifelong obsession.
“Karate by its nature is very adaptive. In martial arts, the name of the game is innovation.”
I stuck with karate until I was 22. After I earned my Black Belt I started training in MMA [Mixed Martial Arts]. It’s going on 8 years now.
I train with Primal MMA. Their whole philosophy is very adaptive, for everybody. They just let people voice things for themselves. So for someone like me, who has very specific limitations, they encourage me to figure it out as I go along.
MMA uses both striking and grappling but I tend to focus on the grappling as it lends itself to my body more. A lot of grappling involves the legs. There’s a submission called a triangle, with your legs. I know I’ll never pull that off in a million years. So, I don’t even try it. I don’t worry about it. I just focus on the moves that I can do with my upper body and all of the other parts of it that I thrive in, and it’s been working great.
I think a lot of MMA practioners aren’t used to as much upper body movement. Here I am a 170-pound guy with a disability and a 200-twenty pound guy can come to the gym and we can grapple together and I can still dominate this guy with all of the things I’ve learned.
Over the years there have been a lot of guys come through the gym with big egos. People with egos tend to flush right out. They can’t handle the early stage of MMA. Only the people who have the mental fortitude are going to stick around and learn. That’s an awesome part of MMA.
It’s fighting, but it’s beautiful. There’s a camaraderie. It’s a beautiful place, a great gym community. We have a great time.
“I just focus on the moves that I can do with my upper body and
all of the other parts of it that I thrive in, and it’s been working great.”
As an adult, I can’t think of a time when I wasn’t really able to do something that I really wanted to do. I mean, I never wanted to be a marathon runner; I guess I just always picked things that I knew I could do. I did Tough Mudder one year with my stepdad, who was in his early 60s at the time.
I kept seeing advertisements and at first I thought, there’s no way I could do that. I can’t run that far. Then I thought, well, I don’t have to run it, I can walk it. So I worked on walking to see how far I could go. I made it 16 miles. That was my jumping off point. So I started looking at the obstacles, and again, was thinking, I can’t do it. I figured I could do at least 8 of them, but there were 20 of them. But, I kept going back to it and slowly convinced myself that I could do it.
Of the twenty obstacles, between the two of us, we were able to complete 17 of them. I could do them sometimes. My stepdad would do them sometimes, or we could both do them. There were a couple that neither one of us could feasibly make happen, so we would just go around them. But that was OK to do. We still finished.
At some of the tougher obstacles the most athletic people would get up there and then turn around help 7-8 people up before they finally moved on, and then the next guy would do the same. It was such a great experience and really helped me bond with my stepdad.
Look, I’m just a guy. I didn’t choose to have a disability. But I’ve learned through Martial Arts that through adaptation and innovation, that a lot of problems can be figured out, and it’s just taking the time to look at and understand what you’re working with; What cards you have been dealt, and then playing them to the best of your ability. You know, sometimes it won’t work out the way you would really like it to, but you just keep trying to figure it out.”
“A lot of problems can be figured out, and it’s just taking the time
to look at and understand what you’re working with.”
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